Stefanie and Jon already had two school-aged children. But their family didn't feel complete. "We just needed a couple more," says Stefanie. "And we didn't want infants."

They knew there were children out there waiting for families. A friend who had adopted three times suggested that Jon and Stefanie work with their local Department of Social Services to complete the training and homestudy. Then they began to search for children.

Stefanie recalls looking at photolisting books and Internet sites for about a year. "I basically had to be my own advocate. Other families trying to adopt should know that if they sit back and wait for the social worker to find them a child, it's going to take them years! There are not enough social workers for all the kids that are out there." Stefanie remembers the search as "a long and tedious process." Each time she found a child she wanted to inquire about, she made sure her social worker sent the family's study to the child's worker. Then Stefanie contacted each child's agency herself. "I was literally on the phone with someone somewhere every week-- actually every day."

The couple enlisted the help of their two children. "I wanted them to be involved since they are older. They actually helped find their brother and sister."

The Westchester County, New York family visited their public library in April, 2001, where they studied the "Blue Books," a multi-volume set of photolistings featuring most of the waiting children in the state of New York. "We found Aliayh in the book first. When we called, the worker said, ‘The only thing is-- she has a brother.'" Jon and Stefanie quickly made it clear they were interested in both children.

As it happened, the children were shown in a Wednesday's Child program that same week, taped at the Liberty Science Center in nearby New Jersey. Stefanie's worker suggested she watch the feature at home on Wednesday night. Not only did she watch it-- she videotaped it. Stefanie says, "I couldn't help but fall in love with them."

Then the pace began to pick up. "Once we were approved for the children it happened very quickly. I spoke on the phone on Wednesday. The kids were at my house Saturday." It was the first of many day visits. Overnight visits followed, and in July of 2001 the children were placed.

Aliayh and Marcellus's ages, now 10 and 12, dovetail with the ages of Stefanie and Jon's two birth children, now 11 and 13. Is it a challenge to turn two sets of siblings into brothers and sisters? "Yes, there are definitely adjustments," Stefanie says. "But they have done very well. We have a three bedroom house, and the biggest adjustment, from the children's point of view, was having to share their rooms."

Jon and Stefanie's heritage is German and Dutch. Aliyah and Marcellus are biracial-- African American and Puerto Rican. In deciding to adopt them, "that was never an issue," Stefanie says. "I looked at ages and likes and dislikes, not color. Living where we do in Westchester County, things are so diverse anyway." She and Jon believe it's important for the children to stay attached to their biological culture while, at the same time, getting to know the rest of the family's culture.

Aliayh and Marcellus's adoption was finalized in November, 2002-- on National Adoption Day. The best thing about adoption, in Stefanie's opinion, is "the great big bright smiles on their faces. Also, the feeling of completeness of the family. We let them choose what they wanted to call us. From day one, it was Mom and Dad.

"Adopting the older ones you have an advantage-- they can kind of tell you what they want and need. People always ask me, ‘Don't they bring a lot of baggage with them?' Well, some of that baggage is good baggage. They just brought new things to us and really have enhanced our family."

Story written by Becky Birtha as told by Stefanie

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